I should stop this. This blog? Maybe. Or these things I'm thinking about right now. This is funny, I'm blogging and I can't say everything I want to say. Why? Well, there you go, can't tell. I seem to be going through a phase, or something more than that. A relevatory rennaiscance from an all-too long existential relapse I seem to have dug myself into.
I only need to will myself into it. To forget. To look away. Delete entries from a list. Hide mementos. Change numbers. Duplicate a once too powerful entity from the past. Relegate some(that means more than one) people on my priority list. Silence my heart. Take hold of my brain. Emphasize realities, realize goals, obliterate conjured inuendos and selective reasoning.
However, I fear for my soul, for my heart. Will I drive them into famine? Will I end up into a mechanical superhuman or a skeletal structure of existential theorems and material vagaries.
Well, I bet those who think I'm not living the "real life" are saying;: "Oh my God! Our prayers are answered, he's coming back!"... Sorry, that is something I would not do unless God tells me Himself, not from some prophet but straight from God's heavenly mouth.
I think I have to end this now, the post I mean. I have to go back to school and start enrolling students for the Summer Art Workshop. Super Perfundo!
